The story of Mitzi and Chapter 12

This day is special for me.  Today is June 1, 2018 Intergenerational Day Canada.

This is a day which is officially a reminder, a yearly invitation for every person regardless of age, to take one small respectful step to bridge generations within their local community and ideally starting with family. It only takes a smile between generations to break through isolation and loneliness, the number one health concern for children/youth and older persons.

I am excited to tell you about how we try to do this with my extended family every day.

Our story goes like this.

My Mom Mitzi, lost her husband, my Dad in 2013 whom was her soul mate and understandably left her feeling isolated and alone in a world that at the time, felt empty and cold.   At 80 years old, my Mom had lived a full life together with her best friend so this loss created deep sadness, loneliness, and fear.  She wondered if her emptiness would dissipate and focused on just getting through each day.

I am 1/4 siblings and we don't all live in the same city.  We found that the worry and guilt of not being able to be there for Mom on a daily basis to support her weighted heavy.

The power of online social media became a solution.  It helped our family to stay connected to Mom.  It became a tool for my family, keeping us close. We created a private family Facebook group called Chapter 12  where my Mom became inspired to journal every night for the past 5 years!  No lie....honestly she posts every night as part of her nighttime routine!

Post #1 - the group was live!

As a close family we  wanted to be "together" during this difficult time.  It was also very important that Mom felt she could be vulnerable to share her inner most fears during this healing process.

Unfiltered messages were shared by all ages 

"Chapter 12 is the best thing that could have happened to me"

Here she found expression for her own voice, openly and authentically writing about her fears, joys, challenges and stories, all shared across the generations.  Her posts at the beginning were of sadness but over the years describe her healing and a testament to the stages she went through on her self discovery.   

"I am always floored how many read my posts"

 

The most recent posts have been more joyful and happy and she is posting pictures of her own new found playfulness with friends.   The posts continue to unite the family, including across the generations leaving a legacy to be shared.  

Stay tuned, this story is just beginning..... 

Just keep showing up.

Just keep showing up and I don't mean in your new shoes with your hair curled.

Showing up is hard sometimes.  We all show up to life, the party, to work and to others in so many creative ways.

I know, because right at this moment I pushed aside my fears and uncertainty to dig deep so I can share my thoughts and show up here at TheBoomerVine.  Knowing the value of being honest and being real was what gave me the courage to sit back down to write here.  

I want to show up for those that need me.  I feel compelled to share my thoughts and fears and uncertainty that I face everyday as I go about being a mother, a wife, an entrepreneur and financial contributor to the family, thinking that I am not alone as we age through this process.  It's been a long time since I sat to write here but there has been so much going on in my mind, my life, my work and in my family.  All the energy that I had was spent elsewhere, not writing here.  

I've missed it.  

The big question is "Who is it that we are showing up for anyway?"

Sometimes I can't show up here because I just don't have the energy.  As an entrepreneur I am often deep in thought or processing an opportunity that somehow appears before me.  Rarely is it such a big idea that it wants to pull all of my energy towards it but recently I let it.  Any energy that is left is then shared with what is right in front of me - my priorities.   

My priorities are for my self and my family.  My incredible family whom without their love and support, I wouldn't have the courage to continue on this journey of self-discovery during this shift in midlife. They encourage me to speak from the heart because they know it is raw, yet authentic and that the messages are to be shared with others on this same journey who are not as confident and also looking to live a meaningful life with more purpose.  It is no secret that some of those in society today are running on the hamster wheel filled with so much guilt they can't even articulate it. They have no time to stop and reflect but perhaps they know what the outcome would be if they did.  Not always pretty.  Maybe they are showing up for someone other than themselves.

I give credit to the ones who have the courage to step out of situations that hold them back (going against the scripts); be it a job, taking a break from university, or from a relationship that forces them to show up for someone other than themselves.  Years and years of this routine can be devastating to our health and others around us unless you have found that balance and living a life you helped design.

I was asked the other day "where do you lose your power" which digs right down to the core uncovering situations that hold you back from being the authentic you and perhaps living a more fulfilled life.  

This has nothing to do with feeling any regret for my past but this is all about showing up during the rest of my life with the openness and adaptability to accept opportunity and continue the design of a more purposeful, playful life. I am openly taking this journey because I strategically want my own children/family and others around me to gain new insight on what is really important.  It is my hope they too will be courageous enough and feel supported to design a life and make choices that reflect more about their happiness and not following the scripts that are placed on us.  

My message goes out to those who have identified the need to make a change (a tiny step or a gigantic jump) and are looking for a friend or a cheerleader. 

It's not about me. It's about you.

I'm often asked for my opinion.  I know it's because I am honest and sincere with my answers.  I show up differently.  I take risks.  I work hard to design my life and live the best I can. I care. 

I take time to review the situation by often throwing myself in to experience it so I can empathize with the buyer or individual at hand.  My thinking is unique and my view is out of the box.  I don't hold back and know honesty is integrity and integrity and courage help us grow.  

Relationships are the real currency in life.  I'm not perfect at them, but I think I get how people think. I am forward thinking, empathetic, and focus on helping make others feel valued.  I also like the word authentic.

It's not about me.  It's about you. 

Moving you or your business forward. 

That's all it is. 

Denise teaches entrepreneurs and companies how to authentically
and creatively CONNECT with their customer,
ACTIVATE the relationship and DELIVER results to drive
participation and REVENUE while increasing the customer experience. 

You can find her here www.DeniseAKelly.com

People ask me all the time why I don't have a website .....

I know, I know, I know.

So, here's the thing.  As a smart and strategic self employed entrepreneur who has taken on risk over the last 15 years, and dabbled into a number of strategic projects with others, I fully admit I need one.  The problem is, do I need just one and how do I crossover my offerings/interests into one fantastic site?

I am aware of the value of a great website and brand.  I have a number of domains that I have reserved for various new business ideas I have on the go and some which may just become an expense.  I even picked up domains for my own kids, in their name, because I believe it will be all about branding as these millennials try to stand out from the crowd.  

Am I the only entrepreneur who has a number of projects on the go, working with a variety of different clients (some pro bono and others paying) in a number of different lines of work that combines their passions?

I have been told that I do represent my brand well, so at the very least, that's a relief! I represent myself and my core values authentically when I meet people or prospective clients.  I show up as who I am and not pretending to be someone else. I have over 15 years working for strong award winning brands like Nurse Next Door, Kids & Company, Kumon Canada and CEFA (Core Education Fine Arts) to name only a few.  

Thus the twitter profile photo that keeps changing..... for me, it is a true reflection of me and who I really am.    

My twitter profile picture might have some shock value, but hey, the reality is that I have a passion for hockey and at 45 I started a female hockey team (I play D) and it is all part of my story.  In this other photo of me on the ice with my girlfriend, it too shows that I enjoy life outside of work which I feel is valuable to a corporate culture. 

Meet my LinkedIn and business profile photo.  Yes, this is me showing up as the professional that I am.  You can see the other (more serious) side and read more about me here.  It's about relationships and building trust. I love collaborating with companies and clients.  Each client themselves show up to me in a variety of ways too.  Some like to meet in the office setting formally while others like to meet over a beer at lunch.  You see, I do respect differences and I am thrilled to continue to collaborate with (and meet more) interesting people, doing remarkable things as I continue this journey. 

So, yes, I do need a website where I can pull it all together to tell my story about how I can help connect to the customer,  activate the relationship and deliver results across a variety of target groups.

Stay tuned.  I commit to making this happen by 2016.  My various mentors tell me it's time.

#4 

Follow me on Twitter 

Looking for a cheerleader?

Describe your business:

I am a high energy CONNECTOR and ACTIVATOR (also a fun feisty Boomer aka Zoomer) who combines integrity, leadership and resourcefulness with proven achievement in Franchising, Marketing, Operations, Strategic Partnerships and Social Media to drive measurable results. A BIG thinker and visionary with the ability to build out an idea successfully! First you need to figure out your WHY and determine your core values to ensure alignment at all levels.

Over 15 years working with a variety of strong brands including Nurse Next Door, Kumon Canada, Kids & Company, CEFA and Heart & Stroke Foundation.

Looking for a cheerleader, I can help!

 I wear #4 on my female hockey team called the Stanley Cupcakes

Started road biking at 50 and rode the Ride to Conquer Cancer
Love the outdoors and my meetings are at Starbucks or on the trails

Passionate to empower women to design and live their best life

Contagious enthusiasm for connecting and empowering others


What business tools do you need?

I can't go anywhere without my iPhone/iPad and my music. Both help me to stay connected to my world of family, friends and clients. Music gives me energy and keeps me dancing and my mind firing....

Fav Books:
Strength Finders
Million Dollar Consulting
Fire Starter Sessions

What advice would you give to other business owners?


Buy Danielle LaPorte's Truthbomb Deck!

She is a firecracker and her daily inspirations are awesome reminders to crack open each day. They inspire as we courageously dig deep to run our own business or follow through on starting a new one.






Connect with me on twitter @TheBoomerVine
You can read more about me here Denise Kelly on LinkedIn

Identify your strengths and stick to them!

It was a actually many moons ago I found myself in a transition and faced with the reality that I had to articulate my strengths and for that matter, my weaknesses during the typical dreaded interview.  You know the moment that you find yourself face to face with the gatekeeper to the organization.....

Heck, we all have a resume and as someone who is continually moving along a planned path of continuous improvement and driving for new personal challenges both in life and in my work, my resume is constantly changing.  I struggle to keep it updated and prefer the amazing world of LinkedIn.

I was tired of living in a world where the focus was on our weaknesses and we had to find ways for self improvement.  I think focusing on our weaknesses sucks energy from us when we could be feeding our soul and celebrating the things that we do well.  Our strengths are what fill us and truly are what we do that makes us the happiest.  Living our passion is usually living and doing the things we love that don't feel like work.  It is those things we generally dislike that make us weak and suck the good energy out.

I decided to focus on my strengths and in my work to find opportunities to share them and truly celebrate them for they are what makes me shine as a leader and a happy contributing adult. I've even given the book to my kids and new university grads.

A very special mentor gave me this book for she knew we shared the same values and that it would help launch me further into my passion.

Here's my strengths.... and they are DEAD on, especially the Woo!  
(compare with your peers and share on your resume and LinkedIn) 

Positivity - always on the look out for the positive in any situation 
Woo - win others over and you are drawn to strangers
Communication - like to explain, public speak and write to get people to listen
Activator - when can we start rarely waiting for the green light
Arranger - jump into confusion, devise new options, hunt new paths

Check out the author Tom Rath and the website.  There is even a book for kids.
www.StrengthsFinder.com

There's room on the rocketship!

Who says January 1st,  the first day of the New Year is the day to kick off new habits and implement your goals?  Not in my house, we typically only get home from our New Years neighbourhood rocker with friends around 3am January 1 (of course last to leave) after a great dinner and lots of dancing,  so we sleep late!  It's one of the Kelly family traditions! January 1 comes and goes quickly.....and usually one of the Kelly's has what we call the flu.

Happy New Year to my pals and readers (I vow to get to know you more)

Let me share some of my excitement for this year.

I am determined to continue to live life on my terms, especially this year and I am going to shake things up and take more risks/try new things.  Diving deeper into the ocean and ditching the lifejacket - hell, don't need that anymore!  I will continue to do what I love and make some money at it giving me lots of time for my stuff, family, dog and traveling.  I have so many amazing opportunities being presented to me already this year and I know it's Karma.  I'm kind to others, incredibly hardworking and authentic in my relationships and I believe when we live with such kindness and gratitude the world throws it back.  I consciously focus on being surrounded by likeminded peeps who are also authentic, big thinkers, activators and approaching every day with a smile.

Hey, don't think it's easy because it is not.  I've worked really hard to get here ....  If you want to come along on the ride with me, maybe do some soul searching yourself, let me know. I've got room on the rocketship!  denise.play@gmail.com

Get familiar with Danielle LaPorte - she's a firecracker from Vancouver and I'm going to meet her one day soon!

www.DanielleLaPorte.com 

Brene Brown, little more serious but a firecracker also!

www.BreneBrown.com

125 more days to go

125 more days to go until my adventure I call
 #itsalongwaytoseattle....
 

I joined the BC Ride to Conquer Cancer , which for those of you that don't know, is a 2 day cycling adventure through the Pacific Northwest region on a road bike over a weekend in June 2013! (Vancouver to Seattle).  I proudly hold a spot on a team called the The Brainiacs  comprised of brain cancer survivors and friends who are committed to finding a cure for cancer.  We will be fundraising and creating awareness for cancer research at  The BC Cancer Foundation. You should also note that I have started a team chapter called The Scardiacs, my own little tribe of beginner riders and that my brave husband Brendan recently joined the adventure.

 

The words "cycling adventure" freaks me out but their marketing message is that this is for everyone - both seasoned and beginner riders. I am told by my long time pal and now cycling Brainiac mentor, Dave Desrochers, that I will be fine. He clearly sees my tenacity for life and positivity, however, I must be honest that when I agreed to join it wasn't until I said the words out loud to friends and myself that the reality set in. 

 

It is however notes of support like this that I have received that make me feel supported by friends and encouraged that I can do this. With each donation I have tried to send a personal thank you card or personal sincere acknowledgement and showing of  thanks, such as a simple hug. 

 

 

Thank you to those of you that have supported me financially and to those who continue to support me in spirit. I will keep you updated through my blog www.TheBoomerVine.com so that you can follow me along on this adventure. Sign up on my blog to receive updates or learn more about me on my personal fundraising page  Denise Kelly.

 

 

Little do you know, I need your support way more then you know so keep the love coming. I am only 30% to my financial goal and every little bit counts.  Please acknowledge all riders on the journey especially those survivors who ride with the yellow flag, because really, we are all doing this for them.

 

 

YOLO

 

 

 

Unleash Your Dreams for 2012

New Year’s resolutions can be frustrating and in my experience the inability to keep those resolutions is often the source of frustration and negative energy.  So instead I bypass resolutions and choose to think in terms of dreams and vision where I want to be in life.

As boomers or busy moms many of us seem to be trying to find our personal balance (work, family, fitness, fun....) and we often forget about ourselves in this equation! Some have this figured out but for me, I admit that balance is still a work in progress (sometimes feeling guilty to put myself first before my family).  Just like a good compass, when we get lost we need to know where we are going!  I remind myself that before you can even think of taking good care of others (family or aging parents), you need to take care of yourself and the question we need to ask ourselves is “what are we becoming?

Setting dreams allows us to create a vision of where we want to go and structure our steps so we will get there. We can dream at any age without discrimination and they might be the fix we need to get out of a slump or to lead one outside their boundaries or comfort zone perhaps to a new job or to follow their passions through volunteering.
 

I am a dreamer and I push the boundaries and reach for the stars in life and proudly I encourage family and friends to do the same.  I want to continue to have a young playful mind as I go into my 50's.  Having the ability to dream and act on our dreams is one of the most amazing abilities we have and the greatest gift we can give ourselves.   We are in control of creating happiness and success in our own life and I know firsthand that the journey to make this happen is as exciting as achieving an individual dream itself.  The personal change will affect your family, your work and help you to discover your passions or unleash your real character traits! Most people have forgotten how to dream, given up or think their dreams will never become a reality.

My dreams are in pictures and I have used vision boarding to help as my reminders.  Simple words can act as reminders to me.


Vision boarding is like a storyboard to map out or keep your goals top of mind.  Your vision board reinforces your positive images and a process that helps identify areas in your life that are important to you.  It’s like replacing negative self talk with positive self talk or highlighting the positive.

So, as the new year unfolds why not unleash those dreams and whether you consider them resolutions or not, make a list using pictures and figure out the steps you need to get there. 

I want to be the support and the strength to help others as they embark on this journey or at least help others see the possibilities!  Thank you to those who have allowed me to help them become more as they prepare to re-enter the work force and create their own businesses encompassing their own dreams.

Check out  www.unleashdreams.com or pick up The Vision Board – Joyce Schwarz.  Our team at Unleashdreams share a vision of helping others see their possibilities and to help them shape their future.